I have been blessed with intuitive foresight to plan my week so that I would have a lot of quiet in the mornings with the filling and emptying of the moon and with the early sunset. The quiet has been a gift. This is the dark of the year, a time when we naturally and rightfully turn inward. I didn’t want to talk, just sit quietly by the fire. Sometimes I would read. Most times I listened to my heart and my head. I watched the feelings and thoughts bubble up. Some were leaving, simply needing acknowledgement of their existence before bidding me adieu. Others were wanting attention and to meet other ideas and emotions, ready to form a collective that will manifest into something beautiful and useful. And some still lost, wanting to be on their own journey through my heart and head. It has been a magical week. I am not yet ready for Solstice though I am much closer than I was this time last year.

Astrologers tell us that this is the most powerful Solstice we have had in a long time. There are astrological configurations that, when aligned with, can help us manifest an overwhelmingly powerful and successful year. Sign me up! Though, from my inner drive for silence and pondering my future, I think I must have signed up before birth.

A lot of people my age are considering retirement right now. I thought about it. It made me nervous. I am looking at what to do next; what can I engage in that will further healing, enlightenment and joy on Earth.  Where will my particular talents be most effective? It is clear to me that I am far from finished with my service on this planet. I am on this side of 50 and do realize that time is less so it is important that I listen deeply and choose wisely.

To support this truth, I will light a fire tonight, sit in meditation to acknowledge, bless and release the old feelings and thoughts that do not belong in my future. At the break of dawn, I will walk where Mother Water and Mother Earth meet. I will feel of the beauty and power of the Mothers and be greatful for their communion and gifts. And, at the moment of Solstice (12:15 pm EST), I will light a candle and share the little I know of my future with Spirit and be open to receiving all that will come with as much grace, joy and gratitude as I will have in each moment of my life.

And, we will begin again.

Blessings for a joyful, abundant, loving and healthy year.

The Holiday Season

We are deep into the holiday season and I am just coming up for air.  There has been a lot of completion and a lot of fresh starts. I guess I’ll just say, there’s been a lot of living going on. Even though my head is up, I am not sure where I am or where I am going. I have heard similar stories from quite a few of you. The good news is that Solstice is coming up on December 21st at Noon:15 EST.

I know we are, ideally, being quiet and reviewing our lives. I’m contemplating on the go. I don’t even have patience to watch my favorite TV show (and no, I won’t tell you what it is.) I have also been caught pacing while reading a book. Those in the know have shared that there are astrological reasons for this over abundance of energy. I don’t care. I just want my quiet, pre-Solstice dark of the year back. I want to feel stillness on the Earth, calmness in the Water and peace in my soul.

Hmmm…this sounds like I’m having an energy tantrum and…I am. I believe that we are entitled, from time to time, to not be mature. Not too often, but once in a while seems like it would be OK in the whole scheme of things. Besides, a tantrum every so often clarifies one’s intentions and purifies the heart….

Whew! Thank you for holding space for that outburst. I’m much better now.

I can get back to being an adult. With a little planning, better boundaries, some self-forgiveness and a glass of eggnog, I think I can handle the rest of the season. That is not so say that I won’t be glad for some days off with a little staring out the window and a long walk on the beach. I would like to, at least, know the general direction of my life, again.

So, there will be no Ho! Ho! Ho! in this household. My cats hate those antler head things and I was caroled out before Thanksgiving. The celebration here will be sitting down reading a book with a cat on my lap. Yes, there will be giggles with my kids and rich, engaging talk with friends.  Still, an abundance of silence is at the top of my wish list.

I wish all of you a joyful season. May you celebrate in the way that nourishes your heart and soul.