Neglected Blog

I just realized that it has been five months since I posted something in my blog. I’m in shock! Could it really have been that long? I didn’t mean to neglect my blog. I will feel guilty as soon as I have time. In thinking over the last five months, a lot has taken place. I’m still not completely unpacked from the move. There were several trips during those months and visits from friends and family. We have had a football season, which I could also feel guilty about enjoying. Oh, and those holidays. Wow! Then there is the stray cat that grabbed my heart and is working his way into our home. I did discuss this with the other kitties and they have very mixed opinions. There have been deadlines and opportunities and…so much!

You know, one thing is very clear to me – life just took over.

Hmmm…I have missed writing and sharing insights. Maybe I should take a time management class. No, that would just be one more thing to add to my list.

My only New Year’s resolution — get back to writing my blog. No more neglect.

Blessings

                When I started counting my blessings, my whole life turned around.

~ WILLIE NELSON

 

This came across my desk recently and I giggled and shook my head in agreement. There is a practice that Spirit gave to me that I want to share with you. A lot of people use in many forms. This version speaks to the greatness we embody by the people, events and things we are “greatful” for, thus the change in spelling.

Have a small writing book, something you delight in, by your bed with a pen you enjoy using. Before you sleep, write 5 – 10 things that you are “greatful for” or “greatful that.” Just one per statement. Breathe the energy of what you enjoyed into your heart.

These are simple things such as, “I am greatful that I had a few minutes of quiet today.” Or, “I am greatful for the flowers in my garden.” The point is to begin to see your everyday life is blessed. There is love and therefore healing in everything around you.

This works much better when you keep things in the positive. If you are greatful that your boss didn’t yell at you today, the statement would have greater healing effect when it reads, “I am greatful that my boss was kind today.”

As you begin to see and experience this, your life changes naturally and easily. It is difficult to appreciate large blessings until we appreciate our daily gifts.

There is an added benefit to this practice. When you go to sleep with positive thoughts and blessings, you sleep better and therefore, heal more deeply throughout the night and wake up more refreshed.

Quote shared from http://gratefulness.org

 

Mid-week quote

Indian ProverbOur world is to be enjoyed so, hopefully, many things will catch your eye. Few things will catch your heart and pull you to them so that you can’t let go – for a while or for the rest of your life. These are the things that will change us and through that passion, we change the world.

 

And Today We Begin

I live in Mount Pleasant, South Carolina, less than a mile from the Ravenel Bridge, a bridge that has new meaning today. As the world knows, nine people were shot at Emanuel AME Church in Charleston on Wednesday. That, in and of itself was a horrible tragedy. And, that single act of unconscionable violence also cracked open a huge wound that has been festering since the first people were torn from their homeland, brought to this port and sold into slavery.

That energy has been palpable for those of us who are healers and/or sensitive to such things. We have seen it in the eyes of those raised here. We have been aware of it by people’s posture and attitudes. We have felt it in what wasn’t said as much or more than what was spoken. At times, it has made it nearly impossible for me to be comfortable in the community here. My heart broke over and over and I was filled with sadness.

Those that grew up here and/or lived here long enough built up a scab – tough and impenetrably. I admired them. I wished I could be like them. I strove to ignore the obvious and longed to have the courage to ask how they achieved that armor. But, I didn’t want to risk bringing their pain to the surface or be insensitive in any way.

Wednesday, a huge part of the armor exploded. Blood and pain spilled into the streets. And, the healing that was waiting had an opportunity in the grief and shock that was shared. Yesterday, in the show of support and love, Hands Across the Bridge began the healing. It was the tremendous celebration of unity this community needed and longed for. The love began to seep into the wounds of shame and anger. Relief wrapped comfort around the pain of the loss. Forgiveness flowed in ways no one would have previously thought possible.

People came together and prayed, held hands, cried, talked, hugged and, at last, could look into each other’s eyes and smile. No one looked down or away. We saw each other the way we had always wanted to, but couldn’t. We are a community that finally has the chance to heal in a way no one had words for, but every one wanted.

We mourn our loss and know that these beautiful people gave their lives to bring healing to a community, a state and a region that desperately needed it.

Today, we begin the journey of holding that healing, weaving it into our daily lives or tossing it aside and returning to the old familiar ways. I am sure, knowing humanity, that both will happen. However, I do believe that the integration (every pun intended) will outweigh the rejection of love. This coming together of all people has been too long awaited to be denied or diminished.

This morning, the air is lighter even in the oppressive heat. Today, we shine as brightly as the sun, even in our sorrow. We have hope and joy where there was none. We sing in our kitchens and dance in our homes. We smile openly at strangers on the street, because we are no longer strangers. We are a community, an extended family.

Today, we truly begin building a better tomorrow based in love, respect and equality.

Courting Creativity

I have been wishing my creativity back into being. It is returning in bizarre fits and starts, most often in dreamtime. The other morning, I wrote and recited a long poem about spring on the stage in another Universe. I felt and heard myself read it for a crowd who seemed appreciative. I felt the energy of the waxing rise and fall in my heart. However, upon waking, not one phrase – not one beautifully written and received line – was left in my brain.

The other place that teases me – no actually tortures me – is bridges. Lyrical phrases waft through the peaks and valleys of my brain never leaving a trace once I am off the bridge and in a place I could record them.

Why is creativity do-see-do-ing with me?

I tested this. I intentionally drove across the closest bridge a mere two minutes from my house. Sure enough, smart, witty verse sprung forth. Determined to save at least a snippet of verse, I exited right off the bridge, turned the corner, parked, whipped out my pen and notebook. And…nothing. Absolutely nothing…zip.

It is as if my creativity wants total freedom from even the slightest chance of judgment or a rewrite. It wants to float on the wind and dance with the pollen. My creativity does not want to be captured or twisted or conform to my will in any way. It wants to feel as light as the wings of the butterfly and it lands for about as long as does the butterfly.

OK, I get it. Can’t you, my beloved creativity, stay long enough to lighten my heart? Can’t you breathe life into my soul? It is almost as if we are lovers in an ongoing battle of wits. You are being passive aggressive and – and – just plain mean.

I promise to treat you gently. I will hold you with my heart and laugh with you – not at you. I will nod my head in understanding and appreciation. You have my oath that you will have your freedom and recognition on the page. I will write your grace and grandeur word for word.

Come. Stay. Be with me. Share with me your secrets, your sorrows and your insights.

You know I respect you. You know I miss you terribly. You know I long to walk with you, sit with you and hear you in my heart again.

Ah ha! That’s it! You are having an affair with my brain, even though you belong to my heart. Now I am not just hurt with your silence but angry at your betrayal.

Oh you maddening, spying Mata Hari – do not listen. Stay away.

I was only testing you. I refuse to miss you. Stay out of my dreams and away from my bridges. Do not flirt with me. Only come home if and when you can stay with me forever and I can trust you again.

I #@&^% Love Science

This blog title comes from one of my favorite Facebook pages. It’s so true, and I love the fact that it graphically expresses how I feel about the science.

Science and my perspective collide in the most astonishing ways. As a lifelong intuitive, I don’t need scientific explanations of events. Most of the time, I am working beyond the provable, except through the changes we feel and see, sometimes in the most subtle of ways.

So, when my polar opposite – science – and I – meet in the middle, and do-si-do, I am thrilled.

Recently, while working with one of my healers, we had a fascinating conversation about the experience of light becoming brighter. Dr. Todd, as he is affectionately known, explained it from a scientific point of view. Simple. Clean. Logical. Cool!

In very basic terms, when we are exhausted or under extreme stress, be it fight or flight, pain or long term work stress, the parts of our brain that control the five senses and creativity, shut down to give energy to surviving and taking care of only what is necessary.

When we come out of the exhaustion and stress, have relaxed, are registering safety and are more peaceful, our brain shifts into its full mode of energy or operation. Our perceptions through the five senses change accordingly. We are then again able to experience light as brighter, sound louder and start thinking creatively again.

Simply put, it is the experience of our brains fully “turning on.” This happens for me every morning through meditation. That is one of the reasons I am addicted to meditation and this subject intrigued me.

Intuitively, I had understood this truth and accepted it without need for further proof. After talking with Dr. Todd, I also had the scientific explanation. I love knowing both parts of the equation and understanding more fully why our perception of the world changes through the five senses. A perfect do-si-do!

There have been other times when what I assumed to be unexplainable scientifically speaking was in fact explained. My favorite happened during a class I was teaching. I invited a colleague to guest teach because she holds a much more scientific approach to healing and also studies the marriage of metaphysics and physics called quantum physics. She explained the workings of intuition in the body and mind in very understandable terms. I can’t repeat it, but I got it. And, it made me happy.

The truth is that historically, in earlier millennia, the world of science included metaphysics. They were not at odds with each other. On a soul level, I remember that time. So, when in this lifetime, the two come together seamlessly in loving and respectful ways, it lights a joyful bonfire in my heart.

It is clear why so many endeavor to understand the connections. Part of the journey is to mend the fabric of physics and begin to reunite the scientific and energetic communities through research and healing work.

I am greatful to all who hold this sacred. I am honored to understand, celebrate, share and benefit from their passion. I feel more a part of the world knowing that what I know and do weaves into the larger fabric of healing this world.

So once again…“I #@&^% Love Science.” And I love being intuitive.

Crossroads

I am at an interesting place in life – a crossroads – a huge phase of cleanup. Spirit spoke to me of this in meditation and my current astrological chart confirms this. I am not quite half way through this two-year cycle. I was told that it is time to clean house on every level. Of course, I nodded my head and thought, “OK. Boring, but OK.”

I thought that I knew what that would entail – roughly. However, it seems I was ignoring and wanted to ignore the critical details of what it meant to really “clean house.” On the journey of enlightenment, we are told that we must perform our service to the world from a place of love. We are also told that we must first love ourselves in order for our service to have true value. I agree with both of these aspects of Universal Law.

Which brings me to the crossroad that I am standing in today. Today, I must choose right over easy. What does that mean and how does that manifest for me? My purpose is to help people understand and embrace their power. In order to “clean house” I have to “fire” certain clients. It hurts me to do so, and, honestly, I don’t want to. I love the people I work with. It would be easier to go along as we have, but I am uncomfortable and out of integrity so right becomes easier.

One of the principal Universal Laws is of choice. We all live in choice. Each moment we are choosing our experience. It is exciting and empowering when we are able to realize this truth and live it. I model this in my work as well as live it to the best of my ability. I offer insights and wisdom from Spirit. I hold space and time for individuals to come to this realization. It is my intention not to push or rush anyone. We each have our own timing and I have great respect for that.

Yet, when it becomes clear that the client and I are no longer in alignment. When there is no resonance between us, then, I must choose to respectfully say goodbye and discontinue our work together.

We are all teachers for one another. When we move out of alignment with each other, we move on or take a break. I am sure you have had that experience in your friendships and personal relationships. We have it in business when we change banks, jobs, nannies or repairpersons. It is the way we are able to continue to grow in this lifetime. In our culture, we also move a lot, change neighborhoods, cities and even countries. These are positive experiences because they promote our growth.

Growth is change. Enlightenment comes through change. Today, it is time for me to support growth in particular clients by owning my responsibility, being adult, and choosing the difficult task of separating.- even if I don’t want to or it makes me sad. However, I know and trust Spirit to guide us in this parting and know that we will be better for it.

Each client will then be free to find the next right person to bring new energy and insight to their growth. And, in turn, there will be energetic space for new clients with whom I am in alignment and who can better benefit from what I presently have to offer.

I will always care about and have love for these people in my heart. It is uncomfortable cleaning our Spiritual houses. And, yet it is a critical part of growth.

When you are standing in the crossroads, may you have the understanding, strength and love to choose right over easy.

Note: Yes, I am hearing Robert Johnson’s song in my head.

Sabbatical

I haven’t written for a couple of months. Spirit put me on sabbatical. In other words, my creativity dried up like parchment. I felt like I had nothing to say of any value. I have become deafeningly mute.

Is it easy for a writer to be silent? NO! I struggled and I fought with such stillness. I tried to trick my creativity into giving up the goods – a word, a Haiku, a scrap of dialogue – anything! I tickled her. I yelled at her. I cried. I pleaded – all to no avail. I remained absolutely empty.

Finally, in frustration and loneliness to hear the words in my heart, I turned and faced the Silence.

It was a big vacant space – nothing but an empty room with a few dust bunnies in the corners. The paint was peeling. The room was dingy and smelled like old moldy gym clothes. I stood in that space that had once been filled with alliterations and laughter. Before this sabbatical, there had actually been lines of imagery waiting to be allowed into the festivities. Now, there was nothing but the beating of my heart in a solemn dirge-like cadence.

My butt landed on the scratched hardwood floors with a very loud thud. My derrière ached as my brain raced. I had to figure this out. Still nothing – not a blessed thing! Maybe if I were to lie down and press my ear to the floorboards I could, at least, hear the ghosts of my past. An anecdote might sneak through the veil and save me.

Days dragged on and – nothing. I gave up. In Spiritual language, I surrendered.

The outdoors called so I went for a walk hoping the trees would speak to me. They did. We chatted. It was very cordial and light. No insights. No inspiration. I walked. Perhaps Mother Water would take pity on me and quench my thirst for creativity. She spoke. She was kind and let me know it was good to see me again. Yet, there was not one solitary splash of inspired thought in my heart or even my head.

I went home, surfed the waves of imbecilic blather. Magazines waved their slick pages at me and I ignored their shinny seduction. I was as petulant as a bored two-year old. Sleep wouldn’t even give me a break. The only thing left to do was household chores. I was in a very bad place – or so it felt.

I managed a few chores; some dishes, laundry…this and that. I began to smile. A sense of accomplishment crept in from some unfamiliar place. I mused. I chuckled at myself.

But, still no spark. I did feel more centered so I cracked open the door to the room of creativity. It didn’t look quite as dingy. There was one ray of sun illuminating the dust bunnies. As my eyes searched the room, the door slammed shut in my face! I was lucky my nose was still attached. My Spiritual team loudly encouraged to do something other that worry about what was not. Hmmm…

I went to the gym. I worked out. My trainer noted that I had more energy and my form was much more stable. – What did this mean? Did it have anything to do with my imposed sabbatical? Was something actually shifting inside of me with all this silence?

As I walked home across the end of the pond, I noticed a little movement in my heart. Hmmm … again. I almost smiled. Could I be coming out of creative exile? No. Not yet. This was getting terribly boring and that is really the point.

Every so often, we need to stop, take a sabbatical and re-boot. Periodically, as I have come to realize, it is necessary to catch up with myself. I need to rest until the weariness of life evaporates from my cells, the muddle in my brain clears out and there is again a strong sense of “rightful place in the world.” And this “every so often” seems to actually mean, well – regularly.

No, I am not 100%. I know I am better because I am able to write this. I am so happy that my fingers are having trouble typing. They want to do the happy dance across the keyboard. My wonderful Spirit guides have told me that the “rest” is not over. I am coming to the end so it is especially important that I go slowly, not rush, as I tend to do, turn off my brain and get back to walking. They equated my experience to a baking cake that still needs a little more time in the oven so as not to be gooey in the middle.

I miss you all. I hope you are having a great end of the year. I look forward to having something to offer you very soon.

Peace, out!